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Archive for September, 2004

doctors disgust me.

on monday i stupidly screwed up my knee after what dad would call “rough-housing” with ian. errol took care of me and made me to go to the emergency room. it wasn’t that bad–i made friends with the man who x-rayed me (more evidence for buttless’s theory btw), and we left good old tempe st. lukes fewer than two hours later. they gave me a hideously ugly knee brace and advice to see someone else soon.

BUT

soon is relative. it’s impossible to see an orthopedic in this town. the next available appointment is october 12! october 12! i miss good sam.

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at the honors college, a duty weekend is a weekend in: an excuse to your friends not to go out and a chance to rest. sadly, i have found that at cholla the definition is very different.

what is wrong with these people, seriously? how much self-control does it take to not damage everything in arm’s reach and find somewhere outside the dorm to booze recklessly? apparently, too much.

*sigh* i really don’t like living here, but i won’t go into into more details because according to ian, “it just doesn’t make sense to go over why you dislike doing exactly what you are going to keep on doing.” so wise.

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i just had this wonderful stint of happiness that brought me to this webpage to make a joyous post, but then i remembered the plant biology test i have tomorrow and the english homework due. ick. however, knowing my little brain, those horrible thoughts will soon return to the back of my head where they belong. why should i care about those classes anyway–all humanities classes are easy, right errol? you realize, don’t you, that you didn’t like scuzzo for making a similar comment…

but today was good. i talked to abby for the first time in too long, and i hope it was the first step for things returning to normal. cort called too, and that’s always a treat–even if it is only for a quick chat between classes. i don’t think she knows how much i value our friendship.

in health news…

there is fluid in my lungs. i know it’s not good to begin a sentence with “there is”; but it’s such a horrible fact, i think it deserves a horrible beginning. without my mom to nurse me through, i’m biting the bullet and going to the doctor on monday to see if he can help me. i’m determined to get well as soon as possible–none of this sick for a month crap i usually put up with. look at me being goal-oriented! i’m turning into my sister. next thing you know, ab, i’ll be expecting the worst! ah, much love–the angiosperms call.

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yay for freaks and geeks night! twas wonderful minus the incident with policeman on motorbike. honestly, what is the deal? i was rocking the two-year intervals between stops by our lovely law enforcement, but lately they’ve been all over me–three times in one summer? eek. seems a bit extreme. still, no complaints–have yet to be ticketed. anyway, freaks and geeks night, ian’s brainchild, was super-fun, and i invite all to attend next week. monday night, c-holla, 9.30–be there. i promise–you won’t be disappointed.

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i want the world to stop. i want time to freeze so i can relax and take a break from everything–family, friends, school–everything and just think.

i’m so sick of weighing the pros and cons of everything. i wish i could just be. i hate worrying about every decision effecting so many people and things.

i am beginning to wonder if i will ever be happy wherever i am. even at the pool where i was so content, i would still be a bit sad about missing ian or wishing abby wasn’t in mexico. i’m never going to be completely satisfied so shouldn’t i just make the best out of what i have at that time?

life. ugh.

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